This post , I wanna dedicate to this cute boy here:
The following will be very cliché so excuse that or you can totally ignore this part of the post.
Babe , I love you , you know that?
Although I am the worst person on Earth or even maybe the Universe to show that I
love you but I really do.
I hate the fighting and the arguing. I really don't like this at all.
I wish we were just plain happy and our relationship is blissful.
I just want to be happy again.
You know how much I have been hurt , I know I maybe be 'coldblooded' like you say sometimes
but I'm trying to change ... slowly .
Before I even was with you I told myself to never trust guys anymore and being nice was weakness in my eyes.
So I learnt to be mean to prevent myself from being hurt again.
But I don't know why I fell in love with you.
I'm afraid the same things would happen again .
History would be the present, Nightmares turn into reality.
It's driving me nuts.
I'm insecure , yes .
I know I have hurt you alot.
But I'm that kind of person where I can just block
out any unhappiness or problems in my life easily.
Cause I'm so used to it.
I only want to be happy.
I want a relationship where me and you can go
anywhere and do anything or not even do anything or
go anywhere at all and just be happy with having each other in your arms.
I want to cuddle and kiss you under the stars at night.
That's why you sometimes see me staring at the sky like an idiot at night.
I want me and you just having fun .
Like on the beach chasing each other or throwing each other in the sea.
Maybe these only happens in movies but I want it to be us.
I want to sit on the rocks overlooking the sea and
you holding me tightly as if you'll lose me if you let me go even the slightest bit.
I want us just being HAPPY for once.
We love each other but maybe our differences affect us alot.
I don't want our differences to be the one that breaks us apart.
I want it to be our strength not our weakness.
Along the way we may have a few more fights here and there but at the end of the day,
we're still happy.
I've been thinking why we fight so much.
Maybe cause' we're just always keeping our pride and ego ?
Maybe cause' we want to be right in everything .
Can we just let that go ? We're suppose to be one now right ?
Not two different matter. Either we're both right or both wrong ok ?
Who cares if we have no money to spend and enjoy at all.
We don't need money to go out and still enjoy.
We can go cycling, swimming and do all sorts of free stuffs
and still be happy !
I want you , but I don't want to fight anymore.
I really hate it. When we fight we'll always spit out mean words that will hurt each other.
Doing this , we're just pushing the other away further and further.
Until one day , either one of us can't take it any longer and we'll no longer be together.
Our relationship is coming to this point if we don't do something.
I only have come out with 2 solutions to stop the constant fighting...
Go back to the beginning.
Can we restart everything ?
Can we start from the beginning again ?
Where you asked me out and I said yes ?
Where you fell in love with me and I too fell in love with you ?
When we were together during our 1st month , our feelings and what we did ?
Can we repeat everything again ?
or
Take a break from each other
Maybe we're sick of each other thats why we will dig up any small matter to start a big fight .
Maybe we just need a break from each other and with that we can realize how blessed we are to have each other.
Maybe we will only realize what we have lost after we have lost it.
Maybe we need time to think of the mistakes and fights we done and had.
Maybe we can fix it during the period of time.
Please, I really don't want to fight anymore.
I don't want to lose you either but if this continues, I will.
Let me mia for awhile k?
I love you.
♥
Oh, HI!.
The name is мєℓιѕѕα.
